Sunday, December 30, 2012


Ok, folks! I know I've been M.I.A and you're wondering what I've been up to. Well, I am proud to announce that my second book "The Bold and the Ugly Truth" will be released around spring time in 2013. I will be self-publishing it and the cover art for it is being worked on everything looks great and I couldn't be more satisfied. I will keep you all abreast of everything and again, I thank you for your support! :)

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Author Cornelia Smith - "Forever Sistah's Through Tears and Smiles"

Cornelia Smith is a Native of Atlanta, Georgia; she was born on October 4, 1989. While growing up she faced many challenges from living in urban poverty, being raised in a single parent household, and being exposed to traumatic events such as watching her mother get shot and suffer a bullet wound. During these tragic events in Cornelia’s life, her mother enforced that she and her oldest sister move to Jackson, Georgia to be raised by her aunt. As years passed, the author relocated to Atlanta, Georgia, to attend Parks Middle School and later graduate from Carver High School. Prior to attending Carver High School, she became a member of the national honor society, Principal’s list and remained in the top ten percent of her class during high school. Upon high school graduation, Cornelia decided to attend Everest College to become a medical assistant. However, the hopes of pursuing a career in nursing changed once she began to realize her ambitions for writing novels. As a result, she chose to pursue a career in writing and in less than two years she has developed ways to express the art of writing. Now Cornelia is on the rise of publishing her first Novel entitled “Forever Sistah’s”. She has persevered continuously and even won song writing contests, has a demo published, and is diligently working towards implementing a book club. About the book: Five women, each with her own dilemma… Each sister feels alone, facing life struggles with no support. Rhonda is tired of being lonely. London is weak from so many ‘noes’ and fears her dreams will never become reality. When it comes to her man, it is Terry against the world. Candy wants out of the fast life and begins a new one, only to have her past demons follow her. Keshia prays for a better life after a lifetime of pain and struggles, but will the blessing come a gift or a curse? All five sisters seek a cure for past and present hurts while striving to rebuild their sisterly bond. Witness how they overcome the challenges they face in Forever Sistah's Through Tears and Smiles! Check out the book trailer and how you can purchase the book below

Friday, October 5, 2012

The Latest Updates About FRAUDULENT Imprecious Entertainment

As some of you know or may not know, I'm NIGGApreciousent, have told me she will not be paying me my money for services rendered. With that being said, I will be blasting her ass all the way to kingdom come. Be on the look out for the links coming soon! :-) Bossladywriter

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Imprecious Entertainment Will be Continued Being Exposed for the UNPROFESSIONAL she is

Folks, as I mentioned, I will continue exposing Impreciousent on this blog because she has no conscience and she didn't do what she agreed to do. So with that being said, I will be exposing her ass this week on Ripoffreports. Stay tuned and STAY away from that woman because she'll steal your goddamn money, too (In my rapper Khia voice) Bossladywriter

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Virtual Assistants, Indie Authors, & Indie Artists, PLEASE BEWARE OF IMPRECIOUS ENT

Now, some of you know I haven't exposed a reprobate in a while and some of you already know I don't take kindly to people who agree on something and then renege on the deal by ignoring phone calls, text messages, tweets, or emails. Especially when they owe you money. I'm going to keep this as simple and to the point, if you're an artist or virtual assistant who's looking for a virtual gig or representation, I implore you to steer clear of Impreciousent. She makes agreements she doesn't intend to convey; she's unethical, irresponsible, unorganized, and she has no conscience. I've contacted this woman several times and the most she did was email me and return my a few of my text messages. Otherwise, I haven't heard from her since last Monday and she agreed to pay me last week and she still haven't. We're well into THREE weeks and I still haven't gotten my money from her. I believe she's avoiding me just so she doesn't have to worry about compensating me for my services. Well, she's totally mistaken because I will continue exposing her until she pays me what she owes me and what she agreed to. To me, when you agree to pay someone and you blow them off or ignore them, you're no different from a common THIEF! I'm sure if she can pay these pulpit pimps 10 percent of her earnings every Sunday, she can pay her debt to me, which is much less than $100.00. Come on now. When I exhaust every communication with a person several times and they don't respond after the first few times, that is like them saying "FUCK YOU!" to my face and that will NEVER take off and fly with me. DO NOT do any business with this woman! You heard it first from Bossladywriter. Peace! Bossladywriter

Somebody's Ass is About to Get Expoooooooooosssseeed!!!!!!!!

Today I will be exposing someone on my blog later this evening. Apparently this person has an issue with keeping their word and not paying people. If I do not hear back from this particular person before the end of the day, I'll be exposing their ass on my blog. Stay tuned because it gets juicy. :-) Bossladywriter

I'm Baaaaaaaccccckkk!

Hello out there, international readers! I know I've been M.I.A but I am happy to announce that I will be releasing my second novel either late January or early February, 2013. I am very excited and I am also happy to announce that I am doing a casting call for male models to be on the front cover of my upcoming second novel. The male model will pose as the main character, Samuel Lee Baker. I already have the female model to be the wife, Pauline Baker. I am also in talks with my book designer, Donna Osborne. So, I will be keeping you guys posted throughout the phase of my second novel. All I can say is thank you, thank you, and THANK YOU for all of your support. Oh, and if you still haven't purchased my current BEST selling novel, "Ebony the Beloved" on Amazon,you're totally missing out on an awesome book! :-) Bossladywriter

Friday, August 24, 2012

ufus Thomas - The Preacher And The Bear

Creatively Marketing Your Book

I will first say, but I am not marketing maven. But I will share my own marketing experiences. It took me a while to figure out why I wasn't booking a number of interviews for my book. Well, I was booking them, but not as much I am now. Most new writers know their target audience but they do not know how to narrow it down the core. What I mean by that is, writers have to see their book in a nutshell. I suggest that all authors know their audience before they approach them. This is something I had to figure out the hard way. Blogtalkradio is a good way to get the ball rolling. For example, my book is urban fiction, but it is also contemporary fiction, and it is about domestic violence, bullying, and child abuse. I approach Blogtalkshow radio hosts who speak about domestic violence by entering “domestic violence” in the search engine, and that’s how I find results. Authors can also check out other author’s websites and see where they’ll be doing their next book signings and follow suit. For example, if you have a favorite author you admire, you can Google them and put “interview” next to their name, and you will see the sources they were interviewed by, and you contact those same sources about interview opportunities. Advertising is another good method. Authors can check out book adverts such as, AALBC, Urbania, and other related websites that offer these services. Now, I’m aware that many others cannot afford to pay for advertising. So, they can check out a particular website entitled, “Independent Authors Index”. It is one of the most inexpensive websites authors can utilize, and the owner does a great job at promoting authors on Twitter. Last but least, authors do not have to limit themselves to book websites, they can visit their favorite and popular gossip blogger or web personality and inquire about a book review by them, too. Researching, networking, and going out of the box are a new author’s top three best friends. I hope this helps.

Monday, July 30, 2012

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Purchase my BEST SELLING Novel "Ebony the Beloved" for $0.99

You can purchase the ebook version here for $0.99

Linda Jones "I'll Be Sweeter Tomorrow"

Bantering with Australian Rapper and Singer Tessa Cattanach

I recently had the opportunity to chat with up and coming Australian artist, Tessa Cattanach about her latest music endeavors and what she has in stores for her doting fans. Tessa Cattanach, aka Beatrix Kiddo, is a Hip Hop recording and performing artist, and a big fan of Hip Hop music and culture. The rapper/singer was born & bred in Melbourne, Australia. Her close affiliation with her American & Australian music friends, have helped craft her into a credible and formidable lyricist, rapper, live performer and all round Hip Hop artist. Australia is her home and developmental hub, however, her music is for the world, with America and Europe as her desired markets. Image and video hosting by TinyPic Hey, Tessa. How is life treating you, dear? :-) Tessa: I'm great! Everything is really good...working really hard and making great progress. I feel blessed! Since the last time we spoke, you had a lot in the works. Tell us what you've been up to since then. Tessa: Well since then, I put out my first mixtape "Regardless" hosted by NY's DJ Envy around June last year (2011). I recorded majority of the mixtape in Australia, and brought it back with me to promote and distribute in America for the Summer. It was great, I did a variety of interviews, pushed the mixtape to a few artists and production people, attended a few events like Ace Hoods album listening and various showcases. When I came back to Australia I started performing a lot more, all material from the mixtape. In Feb this year I performed alongside Lloyd for his second Australian Tour, and shortly after I supported the Game in my city, Melbourne. Between then and now I've put out various clips on YouTube including my video for "Eff the BS" off the mixtape. Women of Hip Hops website put the video up and got me over 6000 views in 3 days! I returned to Atlanta in June this year and just recently came home, I plan to be back in the US within the next few months. Will you be signing to a major label anytime soon or do you plan to remain independent? Tessa: Appears to be major but all of that's still up in the air right now. My father, who is my Business Manager, is currently negotiating contracts alongside my music attorney. I can't publicly announce anything at this point. You recently starred in the video "Turn on the Lights" featuring Lloyd. Congrats again. I must say the still photos look very steamy and sexy. I know you're besides yourself, considering that is it something big for you. What was the experience like? Can we expect the unexpected? :-) Tessa: Well the video is actually Lloyd's remix to Future's song "Turn on the Lights". We shot it in Atlanta not long ago. It is pretty big for me as I've been a close working friend of Lloyds for almost 3 years now, and after touring with him I was really looking into collaborating on a song and video. The experience was great, he's so easy to work with, and Kennedy Rothchild (the videos director) made everything really comfortable and also really fun. The video is creatively very different, and I think it will turn a few heads ;). Image and video hosting by TinyPic Can we expect to see you in anymore music videos? Tessa: Aside from videos of my own, I have no plans at this point to feature in any other artists videos, but I'd be happy to do it again. I see you like to rap. Do you sing, too? Tessa: I do like to sing, I actually started singing when I was 12yrs old and started rapping professionally when I turned 20. How long have you been in the music business? Tessa: Well I started performing from around 14 yrs old, recording from about 18yrs old, and getting involved in the business side of music for about 2-3 years now. I see you're very curvy and fit. What do you do to maintain your curvaceous figure. Any routines? Tessa: Not really, I thank my mum! Good genes! Is there another femee who inspires you? If so, who would that be? Tessa: listen to a lot of female rappers, I like to hear different creative styles and I like to research the rise and fall of different female artist careers. I mean I don't find myself using a lot of them as inspiration, but I definitely learn a lot from their experiences. Nicki Minaj would have to be the one I follow closely at present due to her complete take over of the female rap genre, nobody can touch her right now. With the handful of femees that are in a male dominated arena, do you feel pressured to anything other than yourself, such as sexifying your image? Tessa: I mean, I try to be as sexy as possible without trying too hard if that makes sense. I like to be versatile with my look, I can wear jeans and sneakers and be sexy, but I can also rock stilettos and some tight leggings. Its all about feeling comfortable but making an impression using elements that are natural (my hair, body, eyes) along with material things like clothes, shoes and accessories. I don't feel pressured to go too far with the "sex sells" theory and I'm quite happy with my image as it is. If someone picks up your ipod, which list of artist will they find (other than Lloyd)? Tessa: At the moment I'm really on Maybach Music. Rick Ross, Wale, Meek Mill... I like Fabolous, Jeezy and Andre 3000. Obviously the legends, JayZ, Biggie and Pac. For rnb type artists, besides Lloyd lol, I like Trey, Beyonce and Chris Brown. Do you write all of your lyrics as well? Who or what inspires your music? Tessa: I do write all of my lyrics, its very important to me that my music comes from my own thoughts and experiences. Different situations and people inspire me. For example my remix to "All I Want Is U" is word for word about a relationship I wrote about over a 3 month timeframe, and "Bussin Out My Jeans" came from me ripping a hole in my jeans! Is there a recorded song out there you wish you could have composed, wrote, and rapped/sang? :-) Tessa: There are plenty! I like a lot of Wales concepts that came from "Lotus Flower", and "Sabotage". I also liked Nicki's "Fly" with Rhianna. But really there are a lot of songs that I felt that way about. What do many people do not know about you? Tessa: Well I wasn't the young child that had dreams of being a successful rap artist or famous singer. I actually wanted to be a Veterinarian and look after animals. Then everything changed after a friend of mine in highschool said I had a really good voice and I started taking vocal lessons. And I secretly like Justin Bieber... Do you plan to move to the states or remain in Australia? Tessa: Ideally I want to own a house in the States and a house in Australia, but most of my time will be in America. What else can your fans, friends, and family members expect from you? Tessa: Other than creating great music, I definitely want to get involved in movies and television a little later in my career. For now I just want to solidify my spot in the industry as an artist and as a lyricist. What is the toughest thing about being in the music business? What have you learned while being the business? Tessa: You learn very quickly that not many people genuinely want to help others in this industry. Everyone is trying to eat, and no one is really open to any new ideas as there's too much risk involved financially. You have to be very clear in understanding a persons expectations and making sure you don't agree or sign to do anything you don't fully understand. Where do you see yourself five years from now? Do you plan to venture out? Tessa: 5 years from now I would like to have had major international exposure, touring and having songs all over the radio. A few albums, mixtapes, collaborations and of course number 1 hits. Then, as I mentioned, maybe some movie or television work. What is your advice to other up and coming female artists? Tessa: A lot of people will say this, but it is true. If you have a passion, you need to own it and push everyway you can to build it and perfect it. Take every opportunity to get your music heard, and to gain experience. You have to be able to take the bad feedback along with the good, and understand not everyone is going to be a fan. Is there anyone you'd like to give a shout to? Tessa: Always so many people to shout out, my music fam KidMac, Chase Baker, Lloyd and the YG crew, Michelle Grace Hunder and Quby my photographers, Rawberry Entertainment for all my latest videos... Jamaka and the Stream AV crew for my mixtape... All the US and Australian artists who have supported my music and collaborated with me, and most importantly my close friends and family. Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Payback is a Son of a Bitch

Purchase one of my latest works "Payback is a Son of a Bitch" on for $0.99. Bossladywriter

Working and Writing....

I'm proud to say that my novel "The Bold and the Ugly Truth" will be published next year. And yes, I will be self-publishing it. I am working on more ebooks and ghostwriting another story that will be republished soon. In the meanwhile, get your copy of "Ebony the Beloved" on Bossladywriter


Saturday, June 9, 2012

Robert Palmer - Every Kinda People (Reproduction Extended)

I'm Finally in Atlanta Making Moves

I know there's been a dry spell on my blog lately but I have been preoccupied with my stuff in order. I am proud to pronounce that I am a new ATLIEN (Atlanta resident). I've wanted to come here for three years and I'm finally here. ALL PRAISES TO THE FATHER! Any who, I am still getting situated but in the mean time, I will be releasing three more ebooks on Kindle this month. I will keep you guys updated about those. So, if you're looking for good summer reads, you'll have not one, but THREE hot ebooks to read by me. I have also secured a new writing partner and we're already working on our first upcoming ebook together. Things have been hectic and bumpy but they're slowly and gradually smoothing out like silk. Stay tuned for more details, readers. In the meanwhile, purchase your copy of "Ebony the Beloved" and "Whooty Cash" on Kindle if you haven't already. Ebony the Beloved Whooty Cash

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The Jimi Hendrix Experience If 6 Was 9

R&B Singer Lloyd Has a Crazed Manical Stalker on His Hands..Eeeek!

R&B Singer Lloyd has a stalker on his hands and her name is Brianna. What is this handsome man to do? Find out in "Lloyd Tube" soon! :-) Bossladywriter

How Many of You Would Like to See the R&B Singer Lloyd in Person?

How many of you would like to see the R&B Singer Lloyd in person? I know I do. I mean, I already saw him in person before and would love to see him in person again. So while waiting for that day to arrive again, I wrote short erotic fantasy story about him a few years ago. And I recently decided that I might write and release a series on "Lloyd Tube" instead of a one-time brief story. Maybe. But...we'll see. In the meanwhile, I'm working on the story and it will be released on Amazon VERWY VERWY soon (In my Elmer Fudge voice). Stay tuned, loyal readers. :-) Bossladywriter

R&B Singer Lloyd Featured in Upcoming Erotic Book

Yes, you read it correctly. Lloyd is featured in my erotic fantasy novella entitled, "Lloyd Tube" and of course, it's ALL fiction. Here's an unedited excerpt from my upcoming ebook "Lloyd Tube" it will be available on Amazon soon. Stay tuned, readers. :-) Chapter 1.) Freaky Fun Friday Fuck Fest Interrupted…. Brianna finally arrived home from work. It was six o’clock on a Friday morning and she was tired out of her mind. She took off her coat, threw it on the floor, and flopped down on her sofa. She had worked a double shift at “Maverick’s Donut” Factory. Brianna worked there as a factory employee for three years. She was in dire need of a vacation and she hadn’t had one in six months. Due to the shortage of workers, she had to work double shifts every single day. If only she had the opportunity to laze around her apartment for one day with no clothes on, she would be ecstatic to the 25th power. She removed her shoes and massaged her size thirteen feet. Standing on her feet for fifteen and a half hours left her feet looking soggy and wrinkled. Her feet reeked of corn chips and Sauerkraut. She scrunched her face at her odorous feet. Thankfully her feet weren’t hideous looking. She needed a quick me pick up and the only things that could sooth her mind and body was a stiff drink, a warm bubble bath and Lloyd’s music. Brianna walked to her bathroom and started disrobing. By the time she was fully naked, she turned on the boom box that was sitting on the toilet top. She pressed “Play” and Lloyd’s “One For Me” came on. She looked in the mirror and grimaced at what she saw. The bags under her eyes were so huge, they made her look like she was crying. Her naturally coily hair looked like a disarrayed field of cotton. It’s no wonder some of the passengers gave her a disapproving look on the bus earlier. “Damn I need a vacation Pronto!” She thought. If she only had the opportunity to spend the whole day with Lloyd, she would be the happiest woman on the universe. She walked to her tub and turned on the water. She reached for the generic brand dish detergent and poured it in the warm water. She put her hands in the water to make suds.Once the water was sudsy, she put one foot in the tub at a time and sat in the water. As soon as she sat down in the bubbly water, she inhaled the lemon scent of the dish detergent. The stress slowly lifted itself from her shoulders. If she had the freedom to expend her whole day in the bathtub, she would jump through hoops to do it. She had “One for Me” on repeat. That was her favorite track on Lloyd’s “Street Love” album. Brianna loved herself some Lloyd. That man could croon her from sea through shining sea. “Lord have mercy. I would give my left kidney to share this sensual bubble bath with Lloyd’s sexy ass.” She said to herself. Brianna didn’t have many friends. In fact her friends didn’t see what she saw in him. They complained about how dangerously obsessed she was with him. She really didn’t care about their Lloyd bashing opinions though. She’s been infatuated with Lloyd since she first saw his “You” video featuring Lil Wayne. Lloyd had her mind blown and he became her sedative ever since. She opened her thighs to invite the bubbly water into her sweet Queendom. The bubbles accepted her invitation and traveled until they were nestled inside causing her to arch her back in ecstasy. Her mind started to wander and her eye lashes fluttered like a butterfly in the wind. Suddenly,she felt her leg rise. She wasn’t lifting her own leg though. The help from a strong hand was lifting her leg. She sat up in the tub and saw Lloyd massaging her calf. She gasped so hard, she almost swallowed her tongue. Lloyd grabbed her heavy hand and slowly pulled her two-hundred-sixty pound, six foot two inch frame towards his and said, “Girl you’re like my favorite song. I want to turn you on and make love to you all night long.” Brianna was beyond speechless. She was shook up! She was picking her brains on what to say next but she was shocked out of her senses. Lloyd wrapped his arms around her and started kissing her lips. His lips were soft like a baby’s behind. He started kneading her nipples with his thumbs until they were hard like stones. He grabbed her left breast and wrapped his lips around her whole areola. He ravenously sucked and slurped on it trailing his tongue down to her hard nipple. He circled her nipple with his long tongue causing her to moan softly. He sucked her nipple until the point of no return and he gave her right breast the same V.I.B (Very Important Breast) treatment. Lloyd wrapped his arms around her curvy frame and he started sucking on her neck. He guided her body onto his pelvic area and inserted his spongy rod inside of her. She was bouncing on his rod as if sex was going out of style. They were panting and breathing heavy until she thought she heard a knock on her bathroom door. She tried to ignore the knock but the person behind it wouldn’t relent. Suddenly she jumped and Lloyd was nowhere in sight. Bossladywriter

Monday, May 14, 2012

Find Out Where I'll Be Next! :-)

Click the letter "E" button and you shall find out. :-) Bossladywriter

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

crackin' - Nobody Else


The World's Worst Jobs by Paul Mooney Jr.

Mary J. Blige Burger King Commercial Roasted by Paul Mooney Jr.


Lloyd - Shoulda Been (Prod. by B. Cox) ( NEW RNB SONG 2012)

Denroy Morgan "I'll I Do Anything For You 1981"

Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell - "Your Precious Love"

When Can I See You- "Baby Face"

Friday, March 30, 2012

Johnny Gill - There You Go

I am Looking for a Stage Play Director to Stage My Book

I am the author of "Ebony the Beloved" and I'm looking to have my novel adapted into a stage play. The script for the play is done. I just need help with finding a venue as well as having it staged. You can also review my novel on Amazon to see if this would be the kind of material you'd direct. You don't have to be like Tyler Perry, but you must be proficient about staging a play. You MUST be in the Florida area. If you fit this criteria, please email me: Serious Inquires, PLEASE! I look forward to hearing from you.

S/N: I check my emails frequently.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Products That Contain Aborted Fetal Cells

Click link for the list here: KipNews

More Coming Soon

New job and more projects are coming soon. Stay tuned, folks! The best was made to be saved for last. :-)

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

@Dormtainment - Bad Boys Club Reunion Pt.2

@Dormtainment - The Sitcom [Parody]

@Dormtainment - Bad Boys Club [Parody]

@Dormtainment - 5 Ways To Be A Bad Roommate

@Dormtainment - To Catch A Predator

@Dormtainment - Boot Fearing American

Shit Everyone Says

@Dormtainment - Interactive Sex

Death of 10-year-old involved in school fight declared a homicide

Los Angeles (CNN) -- Officials have ruled the death of a 10-year-old girl who got into a fight last week to be a homicide, authorities said Monday.

Joanna Ramos, a fifth-grade student at Willard Elementary School, died of blunt force trauma to the head six hours after an altercation with a female classmate that lasted less than a minute, said Long Beach Police spokesman Sgt. Rico Fernandez.

Authorities have identified the other girl, who is 11, as well as several onlookers, and they are continuing to investigate what happened.

"There are several accounts of what transpired based on interviews with witnesses, but we have not concluded the precise motive," Fernandez said.

In a statement, police said Ramos and her unidentified classmate had challenged each other to a planned fight when their school session ended Friday. "The two girls met in a nearby alley next to a church and began hitting each other," Fernandez said.

The fight was brief, and no weapons were involved, authorities said.

According to Long Beach Unified School District spokesman Chris Eftychiou, Ramos finished her regular school session at 2:12 p.m. Friday and was supposed to remain on campus to begin her scheduled after-school program at 2:30.

"We believe the altercation occurred during that 15-minute window because she apparently left and returned for the session, which involves help with homework and academic-related activity," said Eftychiou.

After the fight, the girls left and went their separate ways.

Ramos stayed in the afternoon session for about an hour but did not exhibit obvious signs of physical trauma, said Eftychiou. "When she did complain of not feeling well, her cousin picked her up, but we had no indication she was involved in an altercation," he said.

"Only when she was at the hospital did we get word about the altercation, and there is no indication that bullying was a factor," said Eftychiou.

Once the investigation and autopsy are complete, the findings will be turned over to the Los Angeles County District Attorney's Office for review and to determine whether charges will be filed in the case.

No arrests have been made, authorities said.

On Monday, grief counselors were brought into Willard Elementary to assist instructors and students. "It was a somber day," said Eftychiou.

Ramos had been enrolled at the school for about a year and a half, he said.


Kansas Teen Shot Hoops in Meningitis-Induced Coma

Teen basketball star Maggie Meier had perfect free-throw form, even when she was in a coma.

In the fall of her freshman year of high school, Meier got meningitis, a bacterial infection that spurred swelling in her brain and sparked terrifying seizures in the healthy student athlete.

"I'll never forget it," said Meier's mom, Margaret, a pediatric intensive care unit nurse. "Her eyes rolled back, and I knew what was happening. It was terrifying."

That seizure, the first of 20 that night, marked the start of a 100-day hospital stay for then-14-year-old Meier of Overland Park, Kan., most of which she spent in a coma.

"Seeing her every day, not getting any better, it was horrible," Margaret said, detailing the tubes that delivered nourishment and life-saving medications to her unresponsive daughter. "But she would do things that would make us know she was still there."

Although Meier couldn't talk or walk in her trancelike state, she could still shoot hoops.

"She would wake up for two to five minutes and shoot the ball, then be completely out of it again," said Margaret, describing the perfect swish of a beach ball through the makeshift net of Meier's sister's arms. "That's when we knew we were going to get her back, and get her back all the way."

Meier's neurologist, Dr. William Graf, said he'd never seen anything like it.

"It was just incredible," said Graf, now a professor of pediatrics and neurology at Yale University in New Haven, Conn. "She couldn't walk or eat, had no basic functions, but still had this perfect shooting motion. It was engrained."

The severe swelling in Meier's brain had disrupted the connections between nerve cells, and there was no guarantee those connections would ever be restored.

When Meier's immune system cleared the infection and she finally woke up, she had to relearn everything -- how to walk, talk, read and behave -- from scratch.

"She was very childlike," said Margaret Meier, describing the tendency of kids to "just say whatever they want" without inhibition. "All those social things you learn over years and years, she had to relearn. And she had some aggressive behaviors, especially towards me."

Over two months of intensive rehab, and with the unwavering support of her parents and five siblings, Meier slowly came back.

"It wasn't easy," her mom said, recalling the violent outbursts and the need to install special locks on all the doors. "It was months and months of intense work."

Five months after she was hospitalized, Meier returned to Blue Valley Northwest High School, where she got one-on-one instruction from a special education teacher as well as physical and occupational therapy. Her spot on the basketball team bench was lovingly marked with a sign and her teammates wore beads on their shoes with her initials.

"Basketball was hugely important in her recovery," said Margaret. "It's been such a major part of her life since third grade, and she always wanted to get back to it."

And in her sophomore year, she did, earning a spot on the Huskies' junior varsity team. The next season, Meier joined the varsity squad. And on Monday, her high school's Senior Night, the 17-year-old was part of the starting lineup.

"To see where she is now, after what she's been through," said Margaret, voice shaking, "she's just such a great kid."

In the fall, Meier will start college at Benedictine College in Atchison, Kan., where she plans to major in nursing or special education. Her mom can't imagine a better fit. "She can really relate," she said.

Whether Meier will play college ball is still up in the air, given her undoubtedly hectic class schedule and busy social life. But her mom is confident she can do anything she puts her mind to.

"If she wants to play ball, we'll be behind her 100 percent," she said. "We're so proud of her."

Yahoo News

New York Man 'Grows' Six Inches Through Surgery - Yahoo! News

At five foot, six inches, Apotheosis was shorter than the average American male and very unhappy about it.

So he did something other men who feel short might consider unthinkable: he opted for costly, painful surgeries to make himself "grow" a total of six inches.

"I realized that the world looked at me a certain way that I didn't look at myself in that certain way," said the 37-year-old New Yorker, who goes by the pseudonym "Apotheosis" in online forums and asked that "20/20" not use his real name. "I wanted the way I felt about myself and the way the world felt about me to be similar."

Apotheosis is one of a "growing" number of men pursuing limb-lengthening procedures for cosmetic reasons.

Dr. Dror Paley, a renowned osteopathic surgeon at the Paley Institute at St. Mary's Medical Center in West Palm Beach, Fla., performed 650 leg-lengthening surgeries last year.

Most of Paley's patients have severe deformities or dwarfism, but he also sees cosmetic patients.

"The majority who come for cosmetic limb lengthening have what we call, height dysphoria. They're unhappy with their height," said Paley, adding that therapy has little effect on changing a patient's views. "It's one of the few psychologic-psychiatric disorders that you can actually cure with the knife."

That is precisely the reason why Akash Shukla, 25, decided to undergo the procedure. At age 18, the New Jersey man was devastated to find out that his final height would be 4'11 ½.

"I felt like my short stature was kind of causing a void inside me- an emptiness in my heart, if you will," he said.

And not everyone was encouraging.

"There are people that have said, 'just accept what God gave you. But, in some way, shape or form everybody is trying to alter what god gave them. If God gave kids crooked teeth, they get braces," said Shukla, who is now almost 5'2" thanks to the surgery.

But limb lengthening is certainly not like straightening teeth.

Only a few doctors, including Paley, perform the procedure in the United States.

Surgeons break the leg bone in two and implant a state-of-the-art telescopic rod into the middle of the broken bones which then pulls the bone apart very slowly, about one millimeter a day.

New bone grows around it and tissues like the muscle, the nerves, the arteries, and the skin, regenerate as well.

At about $85,000, the procedure is expensive and the process lengthy. It takes at least three months to complete it and it requires demanding and excruciating physical therapy.

Apotheosis is still in recovery and he does not want to go public even though this is his second surgery. "I am still lengthening right now and there could be further complications and I don't want to talk about it successfully until it's been successful."

But he is candid about his leg lengthening journey on, an online forum for people interested in the procedure.

"I am not telling anyone they should do this surgery, but I am laying out my experiences and the risks that I have taken and the successes that I have had and let people make their own decision," he said.

Many go to the site looking for advice on doctors, often foreign, as the cost for the surgery could be less than half as much overseas.

Apotheosis traveled to Germany to have internal rods implanted and now he is the one responsible for controlling the lengthening, twisting his legs back and forth to extend the rod inside.

Despite the pain and financial burden, patients like Apotheosis say those few more inches of height can make a big difference.

"When I walk down the street a different person perceived differently by the world for the rest of my life, you know, I am who I want to be now," he said.

He chose the moniker Apotheosis, he said, because "it means to become godlike -- become the best you can be. It's a Greek word."

"And that's kind of what I want? And I am not trying to be godlike; I am trying to be the best me that I can be."

Cited here: Yahoo News

Paul Mooney on (Tiger Woods)

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Ebony in High School

I've had the pleasures to speak at FIVE colleges. I must say the experience was pleasurable and I will be speaking at MANY more colleges and universities. Next, I'll be speaking at high schools. Many high school officials may be reluctant about allowing me to speak to their students about my book because of the profanity and explicit content.

Well, kids today are exposed to all sorts of things. They're having babies before they're old enough to drive and vote. Therefore, the contents of my book will not influence them to do the wrong things, except help them overcome the challenges they're combating. "Ebony the Beloved" isn't your typical urban lit book; it's a realistic, fiction help guide. I had one parent purchase a copy of my book for her 16 year old daughter. Besides, kids today wear tattoos before they're 18. Who says I have to read the profanity-filled passages to the underagers anyway.

I will be contacting high schools for the first time, and if the principles agree to have me speak at their high school about the book, I'll let all of you know, of course. It may be difficult securing speaking venues at high schools at first, but it isn't impossible. Stay tuned, readers and readerettes!


I STILL Don't Want a Boyfriend!!!

The Four Tops-Shake Me,Wake Me,When It's Over

Westwood - Lloyd *EXCLUSIVE* on tour in UK

First Look: Lloyd - Do It Again (Video Pics)

Cited here: ThisIsRNB

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Ebony the Beloved - What's New?

Hey folks,

I'd like to thank you for your loyal readership. I have been scheduled to speak at a local state college tomorrow, as well as three more learning institutions next week. I'll be speaking at one university and three more colleges. I am very honored to have the opportunity to speak about the book I've dreamed about prior its' existence. The list of schools I'll be speaking at are: Palm State College, Broward College, City College, and American Intercontinental University (the college I graduated from). I am BEYOND proud of my hard work and efforts. And the best is YET to come. Also, the script for the stage play should be completed this week. And a screen play will ensue. I thank you all again, and if you STILL haven't purchase your copy of my novel "Ebony the Beloved," it is never too late. Buy your copy today! :-)


Was Whitney Houston A Blood Sacrifice for FAME??

Monday, February 6, 2012

Stage Play for "Ebony the Beloved"

A stage play is in the works for my novel, then a screen play. All I can say is...stay tuned! :-)

Jackie Brown Film Trailer

This movie gets better and better every time I watch it! lol :-)

I'd Like to Thank Everyone...

I'd like to thank all of my international readers (naysayers included) for all of your perpetual support. The best is yet to come! :-)

Lloyd, “So Gone” MP3

Hmm..I don't think this is Lloyd's best work, but that's just me. Perhaps some of you might like it:

More Speaking Engagements

So...I may be granted the opportunity to speak at more college campuses about my novel. Stay tuned for more upcoming venues, folks! :-)

Ralph Tresvant-Money Cant Buy You Love

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Goodbye, Middle Class

Nearly one in two Americans is now living on the lower end of the income scale, according to the Census Bureau. For a family of four that's less than $45,000 a year. These are three families who are falling out of the middle class.

One bedroom for a family of five

Previous pay: $110,000
Current pay: None
Where they live: Staying as guests in a friend's home

Talia Mobley and her husband Adam have been out of work for more than two years. Adam was a lead technician for Comcast and says, "I had it made." Talia worked in customer service.

Collectively, they have sent out 500 resumes but have not gotten one job offer.

Talia went back to school to retrain as a Certified Medical Assistant because she heard health care is where the jobs are. But she still hasn't been able to find work.

Fifty percent of the unemployed in New Jersey have been out of work for more than six months, and it's a similar story in Florida, Illinois and Nevada, according to the Brookings Institute.

From six figures to the poverty line

Previous pay: $130,000
Current pay: $15,000
Where they live: Their foreclosed home, awaiting eviction

This family of 5 represents what it can look like when the bottom falls out of the middle class.

They live in Morris County, N.J., where the median household income is $91,403.

Unwilling to show their faces, they still wanted to share their story. The father used to make over $100,000. But then his 6-figure, telecom job of 20 years went to India.

They haven't paid their mortgage since 2009 and wake up each morning wondering if today will be the day they are evicted.

[Also see: America's Most Overpriced Cities, 2012]

Not living in poverty but not making it

Previous pay: $40,000 to $50,000
Current pay: $12/hour
Where they live: Family shelter

A mother and her three children in Bergen County, N.J., now call a shelter home. Too ashamed to show their faces, the mother says, "I never thought in a million years I'd be at this point."

But when she lost her customer service job, she could no longer pay the rent in a county where the median household income is $77,000.

The manager of the shelter sees more and more families like this -- stuck in the middle. Not living in poverty but not making it either.

Since we first met her, the mother has been re-hired by her previous employer working in customer service, but only part time.

Cited here: CNN Money

Friday, February 3, 2012

Cheers to Brandie Randolph, The Thieving Editing Drunkard!

Hello all,

It's been a while since I've written a blog post. I usually embed photographs and videos. But today I was alerted about a certain reprobate today. So, I felt the need to write this blog post. It's been a while since I wrote anything this year, because I've been preoccupied with promoting my novel, and becoming the next BEST literary sensation, of course. So today, I'll be roasting, posting, exposing, and DISPOSING! I'm sure some of you remember the previous blog posts I've written about Editor Brandie "Theivin' Ass" Randolph last year. Yeah, I thought you'd remember. Lol. Anywho, this reprobate created a thread on six days ago, diminishing the quality of my book, while denouncing my publisher's reputation. I'll curtail what she said by adding the two links to the threads here: >>>>>>>;

Keep in mind, this bucket of pig vomit responded to one of the other bloggers on, when they asked rather my publisher is reputable or not. I don't have the link to that one, because when I clicked on it, it was nowhere to be found! Lies much? LOL! Ok, so, she effortlessly created two threads; throwing me and my publisher under an 18 wheeler. She made comments about my book being riddled with grammatical errors, etc etc. Basically, she compiled a thesis paper based on the information she found online about my publisher and me, and she published it under the thread she created. And she ONLY did it for four reasons:

1.) She's still SOUR, CRUNCHY, BITTER, and SALTY about me unfollowing her on twitter for not taking responsibility for answering the interview questions I sent her. I used to be a writer for a magazine that I was going to interview her for, until she waited two weeks later to pull a "I never received the interview questions" out of her ass, after I've emailed her the interview questions two weeks prior to that. After I unfollowed her on twitter, I received this notification from her on Twitter, saying that I unfollowed her, and she must unfollow me now. (Laugh my ass off). I mean, who hell keeps tabs on who's following them, and who isn't following them on Twitter? Why the hell do you care about strangers who unfollowed you, you ass hat! This broad doesn't even know me from Travis, and she subliminally attacked me for blowing holes through her thin "bull shit" exterior, and for slamming the door in her unprofessional ass face! lol And not only did she attack me on Twitter, but she did it on a public professional literary group, of ALL places. Before all of this "blow up," I knew she was up to no good. I discoursed with Brandie over the phone twice. And after our second phone conversation, I knew she was trouble. I'm the kind of person, when something seems, looks, feels, or SMELLS like bullshit, it's BULL SHIT! And I saw through hers right away. Lol

2.) I slammed her via my initial blog post for ripping off authors. I was just waiting for her to screw up, so I could expose her for the unprofessional two-bit filth she really is.

3.) This woman still follows my blog and the blog of the publisher she used to edit for. She read a blog post the publisher wrote about one of the editors who took her spot after she was terminated. And when she saw how the publisher lauded the other editor for being loyal and hard working, Brandie retaliated by creating that thread about my book, my publisher, and the publisher who fired her! (Laugh my ass off) Otherwise, she wouldn't have created that thread.

4.) Not only did Brandie steal from the publisher who fired her, but when they would send her on business trips, she would get hammered in public and yell their name, making them look bad. Plus, she was sleeping with the authors, while on the trips. Before I knew all of that, I suspected she was a watered down literary version of Karrine "Super Head" Steffans. It's no wonder she cohorts with New York Times and Essence Best Selling authors. (Laugh myself to the grave).

And how do I know it was Brandie who created that thread; it's very basic, everything she wrote are akin to one another. Hence, the four reasons why she's furious. Just read the thread, and you'll connect the dots. Way to go, ALICE SHORT CAKE! :-D

And this note is for Brandie. Brandie, you seemed to know the in's and the out's of the literary industry. Since, you know so much about being a reputable editor, and publisher, why don't you to explain and wiggle yourself out of this one >>>>>>>; Folks, be sure to read the very last post. The first three are the "good" things about her company.

And when did it become reputable to fuck your way to the top and steal? You don't have to rush or worry, I'll wait. (Files finger and toe nails).

And how come you waited several months after I dragged you on my blog to pull such a so-called stunt now? Dear, I'm afraid you're several months late, and $1,100 short (Hence, the money you stole from the publisher you were fired by).

And since I'm such a "nobody" why did you send me a news letter via email last month about your "company." I mean, a mentally impaired person wouldn't do anything that illogical. Were you trying to taunt me, or get me to pay you to edit my novel? LOL Sure, you can edit my second novel, FOR FREE! I mean, you've been editing my blog posts, articles, and my first novel anyway. So...why not? It isn't like I'm going to compensate your thievin' ass. lol!!!!!!!!!!

And as far as me being your biggest cheer leader, it's more like I'm your biggest JEER leader. Because I will continue to jeer and boo you until you've had enough. Since you're always parched for my attention, I will continue quenching your thirst until you drown! Keep in mind, sweetie,this isn't beef.I'm practically a vegan. I'm just setting the record straight. Believe me, you can continue barking, and howling up that tree until the cows and rooters come home. Because you're only feeding and fattening my victory. So, you're entitled to your opinions because nothing you say carries any weight. Your comments are like a credit card with insufficient funds: They're invalid.

And when do you get off connecting an editor to a book they never edited? Of course, she edited my book, but the other book you mentioned, she never edited it. LOL (Shake my head)

And yes, my book has errors, just like many other books. However, the people who read it were taken aback by the the intensity and drama. A book with a great premise can deter most readers despite of the errors. Now, deposit that into your EMPTY bank account.

And why did you post the link to the interview I did with my publisher last year? I don't believe it has anything to do with her reputation, because your reputation is hanging by a thread. I believe it's your "inner covetous bitch" rearing it's ugly head, because you were declined for an interview, due to your own negligence. So, who's the Negative Nancy, now? Remember you told me not to cut off my nose to spite my face? looks you disfigured your whole face, and blemished our own reputation. LOL

And you're supposed to be a representative for a particular professional writing magazine? Not only are you unprofessional, and unethical, but you aren't doing a great job at representing them. I would never want anyone who's suppose to represent me - make me look bad. I would fire you "Donald Trump" style. You need to shift your focus on cleaning up the speckle you've made out of yourself, and not on the people who scrolled past your existence last year.

And before you speak about credibility and reputation, you need to reevaluate yourself. You've slept with authors, you're a drunken lush, and you've stolen from others. Is that your definition of a good reputation and credibility? Obviously!

And while you're so obsessed about what my publisher and I are doing, and you love getting drunk, how about we toast to my growing literary success. Buttoms up! Now, edit that! *Winks*


Monday, January 30, 2012

My New Mary Kay Store

Hey folks!

Check out my new Mary Kay store. Browse, and don't hesitate to make a purchase: :)


Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Christianity On Reprobate Drugs_Kirk Franklin, Tonex, Path Megazine & Bishop Davis EXPOSED

Wow! (Shots Fired) ----------------> Aaliyah IS N HELL BURNING FOREVER, SHE DIDNT LIVE 4 JESUS

BEYONCE BLOOD SACRIFICE, tireo talks to beyonce dad about jesus

Excerpt from My BEST Selling Novel "Ebony the Beloved" (REPOST)

“Hey, what it do Lashun? IT‟S SHOW TIME!” Carmen said with enthusiasm. She showed up in the nick of time, as Lashun was increasingly ready to start and finish the job by her lonesome.

“About damn time Carmen, you sure know how to keep a niggress waiting!” She huffed.

“Girl shut the hell up. I‟ve already told you I was going to be here in a timely manner. You see me standing here, don‟t you? Let‟s get this shit over with so we both can dip out of here before getting caught.” Carmen countered.

Ebony was now wondering what was really going on, and was anxious to leave. She had no idea what was about to happen.

“I need to leave before I get into trouble.” She grabbed her off the sink and headed toward the door until Carmen stood in front of her, blocked her passage with her foot, and said, “Bitch, you are not going anywhere.”

“Huh?” Ebony was totally baffled and she felt her heart do flip flops.

“I only said all of those things to you to lure you into the restroom so that we can fuck you up.” Lashun said with a sinister smile.

“I must say you put on one hell of a performance. Good job girl.” Carmen applauded and high fived her girl.

“Thank you” Lashun happily took a bow as if she was being praised for an Oscar worthy stage performance.

Carmen pulled a razor from underneath her tongue. Ebony gasped as if she was struggling for air.

“What‟s the matter boo? Are you scared?” Carmen taunted.

“Wait a minute Carmen. You did not tell me that you were going to use a razor.” Lashun stepped in front of Carmen‟s face.

“Bitch, I know what I said. I‟m head bitch in charge. You only do as I say not question what I do. Shut your dumb ass up and do as I say before I give your ass a black eye like I did the last time.” Carmen lashed out at Lashun.

“Ok,” Lashun whimpered. Carmen also pulled a pair of brass golden knuckles out of her back pocket and she slid them onto her hand. She balled her hand into a tight fist and then she went into her over sized Louie Vuitton tote bag. She pulled out a pair of scissors, and a camera, and she placed it on the the sink counter.

“Please don‟t hurt me.” Ebony struggled to say through sobs, as tears ran down her face. Carmen ignored her comment.

“Take this camera and scissors. You‟re going to get all of this shit on camera while I‟m fucking this bitch up. After I have my turn with her, I‟m going to take the camera from you, and you‟re going to cut all of her hair off, and then I‟m going to slice her face up to finish the job. Just make sure not to film my face while doing so, okay?” instructed Carmen.

“Oh-oh-okay” Lashun stumbled over her words. Lashun was growing uneasy about the whole thing. She no longer wanted anything to do with the ambush of Ebony at all. Slapping her in the face and cutting her hair was one thing but disfiguring her face was another. She knew that if she objected or tried to back out of the plan at the last minute, Carmen would wreak havoc.

One time Carmen punched her in the eye for questioning her motives. She had told Lashun that she‟d slept with a prominent wealthy business man who owned several banks in downtown Miami and downtown Fort Lauderdale.

“Carmen don‟t you know that Kill Joy is going to kill you if he finds out that you‟re cheating on him? Girl, what the hell were you thinking?” The next thing Lashun knew, she felt a smack on her mouth and had fallen straight to the floor.

“Who the fuck do you think you are? You must have forgotten that I was the one that rescued your punk ass from that drunk ass lush bitch of a grandmother of yours. If it wasn‟t for me, your ass would still be boosting clothes or fighting those carpet munching dykes off your pussy in jail. Don‟t forget that Kill Joy put your „bama ass excuse for a boyfriend on the block. So don‟t get it twisted because all I have to do is give Kill Joy the word and your bitch ass man will be unemployed and I‟ll drop your ass like a bad habit and find myself another bitch to chill with. Remember: I don‟t need you. You need me, so let that be a warning. Get your bitch ass up off my floor and clean your face.‟‟ Carmen spat. She was not the kind of person who liked being questioned except by Kill Joy.

Since that incident, Lashun did what she was told, and listened without anymore hesitation.

“Please don‟t hurt me. I said I was sorry.” Ebony reiterated in a defeated tone. Backing up away from Carmen and towards the wall, Ebony felt completely defeated. Carmen was the kind of person who believed in handling business first and answering questions later. She slapped Ebony with the back of her hand. The impact of the slap was so profound, that Ebony flew against the wall nearly hitting Lashun who was standing behind her. Her nose starting bleeding and Ebony saw dots.

Carmen said, “Lashun I need you to start filming NOW.”

This time Lashun did what she was ordered to do. She couldn‟t stop her hands from shaking. Carmen sauntered over to Ebony‟s body. She picked her up by her hair and dragged her over into one of the stalls that had a toilet infested with feces and urine. Lashun began filming the whole thing.

“Don‟t film my face girl” Carmen warned.

“I know, I know.” Lashun responded, turning on the camera. Ebony was semi-conscious until Carmen lifted her up by her hair and shoved her whole head toward the toilet.

As she realized what Carmen was about to do, she screamed for dear life; but her screams fell on deaf ears, because her head was hastily shoved into the toilet bowl. Ebony struggled to break free from Carmen‟s grip, but she flailed her arms to no avail. Carmen on the other hand was hysterically happy; Ebony‟s torture was her joy. Lashun didn‟t like the whole thing, and was beginning to feel sorry for Ebony, even as she continued filming. This was something that she wouldn‟t wish on her worst enemy, but she went along with it just to appease Carmen.

“Lashun move out of the way,” Carmen ordered. Lashun was too scared to move. Her feet felt numb. Carmen repeated again, “Ho, are you deaf? I said move the fuck out the way.”

Carmen‟s insult snapped her out of her daze, and she quickly obliged and opened the passage for Carmen to drag Ebony out of the stall by her hair. Ebony was struggling to get free and she was choking and coughing on the filthy toilet water. Ebony reeked of feces and urine, and her clothes were drenched and soiled. She cried out for help, not understanding why all of this was happening, but her cries were stopped short with another blow to the chin. Carmen punched her hard enough to make her bite her tongue. She then gave her a sock in the eye and blood flew out of Ebony‟s mouth as she fell to the ground.

“BITCH, I FUCKING HATE YOU. DIE BITCH, DIE!!!” Carmen shouted. Carmen began repeatedly kicking Ebony‟s limp body as she lay on the floor. She kicked her in the stomach numerous times, stepped on her face, and twisted her foot as if she was squashing a bug.

Once she was finished, she spat on her and wiped her mouth with the back of her sleeves. Ebony was in so much pain, that she couldn‟t muster up enough strength to plead for mercy.

“Ok Lashun, it‟s your turn to slice and dice this smut cunt and—Carmen stopped midsentence as she realized there was an eerie silence in the bathroom. Lashun was gone. “Ain‟t this about a bitch? This trick up and bailed out on me. She even has the fucking camera. Man when I see her ass I‟m going to make her wish she was aborted.” Carmen was fuming and once she saw Ebony lying on the floor, she spat on her again and scurried out of the locker room before getting caught.

Despite Ebony being seriously beaten and nearly drowned, she‟d overheard everything Carmen had said. Although Lashun was just as guilty for assisting Carmen in premeditating the crime, she was very thankful that Lashun was scrupulous enough to catch cold feet and get the hell out of dodge before doing any more harm to her the way Carmen had. She winced in pain before succumbing to unconsciousness. Fortunately, Carmen didn‟t get the opportunity to cut off her

beautiful coily hair. Coach Murphy walked into the locker room and saw Ebony on the floor. She walked over to the girl.

“Lawd have mercy! Who done dis to you child? Oh my lawd sweet jesus.” She rushed over to Ebony and cradled her unconscious body in her arms.

“I need help in here!! Somebody come quick. Come quick, now!!!”

You can purchase your copy on Amazon. :-)


Monday, January 16, 2012

The Except of My Upcoming SECOND Novel "The Bold and The Ugly Truth" *REPOST*

Chapter 1.) In Jesus’ Name……. Amen…

Samuel looked straight into the camera lenses. His posture was straight, ands he stared into the eyes of America. He looked rather distinguished in his navy blue pinstripe suit. His processed hair was sleek like Duke Ellington’s, and his stoned facial expression lent him a mysterious air. As soon as he opened his mouth, one would think Billy Dee Williams had died and reincarnated himself inside of him. Samuel sounded precisely like him—cool, calm, and collected. When he spoke, it was like the whole atmosphere came to a standstill.

“To all the soldiers in the Middle East, I’m going to pray for your safe return. I take my hat off to all of you for selflessly defending our beautiful nation. My heart also goes out to the families of those soldiers who lost their lives in the line of duty. I want to take this God sent opportunity to praise our Father. Let us all pray.” Samuel closed his eyes and put both of his hands together.

“Dear Lord, I ask that you lay your hands on the brave soldiers who are sacrificing their lives for this wonderful nation. I ask that you bring every last one of them back home in one piece so that they can reunite with their loved ones. As for those who aren’t fortunate enough to still be alive, I know it was in your will. They are now in your hands and they will forever live on through their families. You are the reason for the season and I love you more than I love myself. I will lay my life down for you. In Jesus’ name…Amen.”

“Amen,” the congregation repeated in unison. Samuel finally opened his eyes. His prayers were always powerful and heartfelt. His members always commended him for his epic sermons, but they had no clue that his prayers and sermons weren’t genuine. If they had been mind readers, they would have been shocked by the thoughts that were jumping around in his head. Because all the while he was thinking,“Christianity really makes my balls itch!”

Chapter 2.) Overbearing Father

Samuel was glad to finally be home. He sat in his La-Z-Boy and removed his shoes; he was pooped. “I sure could use a can of Miller Light,” he thought. Samuel hadn’t consumed alcohol since he took the pastoral oath at the World Faith Missionary Baptist Church nine years ago. He released a frustrated sigh. His wife Pauline was in the kitchen preparing supper while his daughter Chastity was upstairs watching “That’s So Raven.” By this time, he was normally in his office working on his sermon, but he didn’t feel like doing anything that night. All he wanted to do was get his mind off of church,. So he planned to eat dinner, watch a movie, make love to his wife and call it a night. He was flipping through the channels until he saw the infamous pastor Kerney Thomas acting like a world class fool. Pastor Thomas’s sermons were so devised and comical, that he could have won a Tony award for “Best Fraudulent Pastor.” The way Pastor Thomas was whooping and hollering, people had to be out of their wits to take him seriously.

“This nigga is a fool ass clown, but he’s funny as hell,” Samuel thought.
He felt a laugh coming on; Pastor Thomas’s performance wasn’t going to allow him
to sit in his La-Z-Boy and watch without laughing his head off. As soon as Pastor Thomas screamed, “Gawwwwddd!” Samuel almost fell out of his seat. He was laughing so hard, he nearly choked on his tongue. His laughter and cough alarmed Pauline, and she quickly stormed into the living room to see what was going on.

“Are you okay, Sweetie?” she asked. Samuel finally sat up and cleared his throat.
“Yes Baby, everything is fine. I’m just laughing at this silly pastor on television.,” he replied. Pauline screwed up her face as if she had caught Samuel watching pornography.

“Lord have mercy. What on earth are you doing watching that no good clown preacher?
The network should pull the plug on his ministry; because he’s got a lot of nerve behaving the way he does. I ought to call that network and complain about his so-called ministry. He ought be ashamed of himself; , but the Lord is going to strike the fakeness out of him,” she huffed.

Whenever Pauline got upset, her nose would turn red like a beet. “I couldn’t agree with you more Baby, but I give the man props for being a good comedian.” Samuel laughed again, but Pauline wasn’t the least bit amused. She walked over to the television and turned it off.

“What did you do that for?!” he complained. What he really wanted to say was, “Bitch, have you lost your damn mind?!”, but he didn’t want to incite an argument. Pauline was two months pregnant with their second child, and the last thing he wanted to do was upset her.

“Samuel Lee Baker, you are a man of the cloth. Watching other pastors mock the Lord is just wrong. You’re a best-selling author with over 40,000 church minions and a seven-year-old daughter. You should be setting a better example than this. What do you have to say for yourself?” she asked.

Samuel loved when Pauline frowned. It made her look even more stunning. Whenever she got mad, she would wiggle her sharp nose and poke out her pouty lips. She stood at 5 feet 9 inches tall, with a cocoa butter complexion, full pouty lips, and striking yellow-brown eyes. People constantly reminded her that she looked like Jada Pinkett-Smith and Kerry Washington. Samuel felt his shaft rise like a biscuit. Her sexy frown was turning him on. He stared at her and remained silent. She was very familiar with that seductive look.

“Oh no, Mister! You aren’t getting off the hook that easily. Undressing me with your eyes isn’t going to work this time,” she said. Samuel continued ignoring her and stood to approached her.

“Samuel, I’m serious,” she said as she tried to muster up the most serious face possible, but it didn’t work. Samuel slowly walked towards her and finally said,

“I know Baby, and I’m sorry.” His Billy Dee Williams-like voice was enough to give her nipples goose bumps.

“Samuel, I’m not playing with you.,” she said, but Pauline was finding it difficult to resist a smileing.

“You look so sexy when you pout.,” Hhe said as he wrapped his strong arms around her small waist and began showering her with kisses.

He started kissing on her neck and nibbling on her right earlobe. She released a moan and forgot about the way she’d scolded him earlier for watching Pastor Thomas. The scent of Samuel’s cologne was intoxicating. She and Samuel could have embraced each other all night long in that same spot without moving. They stared into each other’s eyes and began kissing. Samuel parted her lips with his tongue; he picked her up and was about to carry her upstairs when he heard the door bell ring.

“Ain’t this about a son of a bitch?!” he thought.

Whoever was ringing his door after 7 p.m. had better have a good damn excuse for derailing his love making plans. Samuel wanted to cuss out whoever the uninvited visitor was. He really wanted to ignore the visitor, but the determined visitor rang the doorbell three more consecutive times.

“Sweetie, let me go see who it is,” Pauline said.

“Come on, Baby; I’m sure it’s probably only one of the girl scouts again,” Samuel replied.

“What if it’s something important, Samuel? It could be a life or death situation,” Pauline pointed out. Samuel sucked his teeth and finally put Pauline down. She walked to the door to see who it was.
“Who is it?” she asked.
“It’s Woodrow. Open up the door!” The deep voice demanded.
“Just a minute, Papa Woodrow!” Pauline said.

Woodrow was Samuel’s overly religious father. He was a proud and righteous man.
You see, Woodrow was a God fearing perfectionist who lived vicariously through the Bible. No matter how hard Samuel tried to please him, it just wasn’t sufficient enough.

“It’s your daddy,” Pauline whispered.

“Well, don’t just stand there. Let him in!” Samuel hissed.
He wasn’t necessarily hissing at Pauline; he was really mad at his father for inflicting himself upon him and his family at an inconvenient time. As soon as Pauline opened the door, Woodrow rudely zipped past her without acknowledging her presence.

“Hey Pop. What can I do for ya?” Samuel dryly asked.

“Son, I need a favor from you!” Woodrow replied.
Samuel looked at his father as if he’d told him he was dying from prostate cancer, because he wasn’t used to his father asking him for favors. He was used to his father’s harsh criticisms. Therefore, being asked a favor by his father was very foreign.

“I need you to visit Sista Rosetta at the nursing home tomorrow morning, because I plan to go fishing with two of the deacons from Holy Mary’s Catholic Church.” Woodrow’s request sounded more like an order.

“Pop, I have a sermon to do tomorrow and I plan to take Pauline and Chastity out for dinner afterwards. Pauline and I haven’t been spending enough quality time together lately. Shouldn’t your visit with Rosetta take priority over fishing with the other pastors?”

Samuel was shocked himself withby his last sentence, because he never questioned his father. Even though Samuel was a grown man with his own family, he was somewhat intimidated by his father. Woodrow was a no nonsense disciplinarian and a pastor. Samuel’s mother had died when he was born and Woodrow had had to raise him on his own. Woodrow made sure that his son was in church every single day. Whenever Samuel misbehaved, his father would beat him with switches, punch him, and force him to read and recite the whole Bible to him. Samuel wasn’t allowed to have friends, and his father only made him listen to gospel music. Samuel loved his father, but he hated him for every punishment he’d subjected him to. He still had welt scars on his back from the switches beatings his father had inflicted upon him.

“Are you sassing me boy?!” Woodrow railed.

“No sir,” Samuel replied. “Young man, you are never too old to be disciplined. As long as I’m breathing, I’m still your father. Remember the scriptures, honor thy father and honor thy mother? Well you better act like you know! Tomorrow